Whaaa I broke my fingernails...

An American woman who held the world record for having the longest fingernails has had them broken off in a car crash.  This begs me to ask the question how the hell she would give a hand job with those things?  Ok forget about hand jobs for a second, how does she drive with those things?  Wipe her ass?  Pick her nose? 


Coke made from Cow Piss?

The Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh has invented a new cow urine-based soft drink it hopes will promote its health-giving properties to a wider market. 

Throwing stones in glass houses...

Over in Israel there were some stupid ass kids throwing stones at the Police.  Turns out 5.0 caught one of the kids.  If I was the police officer that caught that kid, I would have personally beat the living shit out of the little fucker, cut off his fingers with a dull knife, smashed all his toes with a rusty hammer, smashed his knee caps in with a phonebook and then shot the fucker in the head.  However, that's just me, and thankfully the police department over in Israel doesn't think like me.  Instead they tied the little fucker to the front of their patrol car and rode into the little gang of kids who were throwing the stones.  Of course the kids stopped because they didn't want to injure one of their own.  Smart ass thinking if you ask me, however, the police are taking a little heat for what they did!  Click on the picture above to read the whole story.


Men or Women?  Who is the better driver?

The above question has sparked numerous debates all around the world.  I have finally discovered the true answer to this question.  Watch the following video, and you can clearly see for yourself who the better driver is.


Chris brown allegedly laid a beating on Rihanna using an Umbrella  ella ella eh eh eh...

TMZ has done it once again, they are the only ones with the exclusive shots of Rihanna after Chris Brown allegedly laid the smack down.


Amsterdam in a nutshell

I've never been to Amsterdam, and I always said that one day I would like to go.  As time passes on, I guess it's just one of those things that gets less important on life's to-do list.  I hear that in the red-light district, they have toilets against a wall without any doors, so basically its a toilet tank sitting against a brick wall, and everyone can see you do  your business.  If you have pictures of this, please email them over as I would love to see them.




If you thought your job sucked, you should put yourself in this guys shoes, his job really sucks.  As well, a wise man once told me something that has stuck with me for a long time, he said to me 'you show me any hot woman, and there is some guy out there tired of fucking her'.  To make his point, my boy Beckham got caught checking out some cheerleaders ass at a basketball game two weeks ago.  Check out Posh Spice, she looks pissed. Becks is married to an amazing piece of ass like her, and he's still got wandering eyes?  This stupid dumb-ass was the runner up for asshole of the day.  He confessed killing someone if the police got him a bucket of chicken.    You know what they always say about real estate, location, location location!  Can't get a better location for a donut store than this.  If the cops are in the field working, they can always make a stop.  I love Jennifer Aniston, and I wish I could get a glance at her legs like Dave.  Here are the stages of a mans life.  Every morning my kids take the school bus to school.  Today I followed the driver just to make sure he wasn't a jerk off, and after he dropped them off, he ended up here.    Next time I fly anywhere, she's going to be my carry on luggage.  The future cast says you are going to have a boner.  This is what I call equal rights! 

Well that's it for the first post.  Hope you enjoyed it.